2009...what a shit-tastic year eh?posted Nov 1st 2009, 7:45PM
Mood: Depressed
Music: Someone Calls me..Someone Looks for Me -- Parasite Eve
Well it was for me anyways...looking back i think i've been in a constant state of depression.
I wont go into detail..cause its useless to do so. But it boils down to not being able to get a job the entire year, the bills growing beyond control and several things done by other people that have not really helped...oh and finding out i had an arrest warrent for 2 years (which is dealt with now, just waiting the court date..)
I feel so helpless..and not in the fun way. I browse the classifieds and craigslist..email to ads that look promising or that i have a good chance at being hired at. When i've found all i can, i escape talkin with freinds and playing some games.
I wake up and the cycle repeats. It doesn't do any good to remind me that "i need to get a job". If that made nailing a job easier, it would of worked by now...but it doesn't. I can't work frickin magic and especially can't even get something as "simple" as getting a measly job when the other part of the job getting process (the employer) doesnt HIRE ME.
Can you imagine what it's like to go an entire year, unable to pay your bills? Unable to buy food? Unable to buy anything?
I mean, thank goodness Mom puts up with me...else i'd probably be dead now (something i've wished for serveral times this past year...) though, i know more than anyone i can't possibly off myself..not while im still sane.
The only good thing that's happened to me is..well...that's personal and something i'm not willing to share. It's something alot of "normal" people wouldn't understand or even comprehend. Though it's the only thing i have to look forward to now that i no longer have my future with school..
Christmas is going to be depressing too...i don't think i'll celebrate it this time.
Submit Artwork 
Manage Artwork 
Manage Journal 
Messages 
Watch List 
Settings 
Logout 
Upgrade 
Profile Artwork
Featured Artwork
Artwork
Favorites
Morning Adventure
Watchers
Friends
Profile
Comments
;
